should I be blogging now, at this time? actually I shouldn't - I should be studying for Chem and EMaths test tmrw. oh well. I squeezed some time today - although I promised myself initially that I won't open the com. then I realized, today I have to :/

my head today went boom boom bang. it felt like as though a thousand hammers is hitting my head. furthermore, my eyes were dry, causing them to be sore. so in school today, after going for counselling, I could have slept, so-called fainted. I could still remember that moment, when everything was just swirling and I couldn't concentrate on anything. bling bling wasn't there, but I learn to be independent. (shouldn't depend on her too much.) yep, that is one bloody damn lesson I have to learn.

maybe starting from today, I'm going to discover more about myself. what is my belief, my philosophy, how I view things from all aspects, from problems to dilemmas. what I like [and I LOVE SHINee is confirmed (: ], what I don't like, how I think. okay, now the pounding is coming back again, at a great timing. nice. here goes the journey that I escaped once. hoodies are nice, by the way - when I wear a jacket with a hoodie that covers my face and head, it means "I'm isolating myself because I need to reflect on myself;"

I realized that my iman is not kuat. now that is a bad sign, because Ustaz always say to think of Allah s.w.t. every single day, every single second. Allah The Most Compassionate, The Most Benevolent, The Most Merciful, The Forgiver, The All-Hearing, The All-Knowing, The All-Seeing. when I have a problem, I turn to Allah. when I want to scream out something in my mind, when I want to curhat, when I just needed to talk to someone, Allah s.w.t. will be always there for me. I obtain much more peace, ketenangan and more emotional strength being a Muslim. (: (:

okay. Idk why, I'm going to abruptly end here. ta.